Chapter 6

The Mauve Mercedes With The Padlock on the Boot

play The Mauve Mercedes With The Padlock on the Boot

WDR: "In your time playing together, do you feel like you've improved?"

Gene: "No, not really"

Louis: "I know how to play in the key of C now. I couldn't before."

Gene: "I can play with both drum sticks as well"

Xero: "I know what all the things do on my saxophone. Except one thing. There's just one, at the top. A sort of twiddly thing that I don't know what it does but you can make dead good noises with it, but I don't know what it's supposed to be for. I know what all the notes are."

WDR: "You know what?"

Xero: "I know what all the notes are on my saxophone"

WDR: " No, but I mean, seriously like, in terms of..."

Xero: " It is serious! You just shut your eyes and wiggle your fingers, or hit things, or twang things, depending on who you are. And if you make a mistake you just repeat it a few times and hope that noone notices."

WDR: " Ok well then tell me..You know the one with the What The Something The Lock on the Mauve...."

Gene: "The Mauve Mercedes"

Everyone: "The Mauve Mercedes with the Padlock on the Boot"

WDR: " Now where did you get a name like that?"

Xero: (Rubbing his hands together with glee and grinning profusely) " Ah now we can talk about this!"

Gene: "This is Leeds "

Louis: "This is Leeds for you, yeah!"

Xero: "Yeah you don't know you're born......Well, the Mauve Mercedes with the Padlock on the Boot - Oh yeah - Translation Tip! - Mauve means Purple. The Mauve Mercedes with the Padlock on the Boot parks near the Newlands Hotel another Joshua Tetley pub..."

WDR: "So this Joshua Tetley is quite well known, no?"

Xero (Chuckling): "......In Leeds, yeah....He's a popular chap....Er and The Mauve Mercedes parks near the Newlands Hotel on Hyde Park Road and we often go and look at it - it's a lovely motor. It's an E registered Mercedes saloon. Fins on the back. Big radiator grill. Purple. And a padlock on the boot - unfortunately - he must have broken the nice padlock cause it's just got this cheap Halfords one on. It's a great car - it looks like a vacuum cleaner at the front. We like it. We often walk miles out of our way just to have a look at it. It's got round headlamps, not long ones. No sunshine roof - Unfortunately it's got separate front seats, not a bench seat, but if it had a bench seat, it'd be perfect.

We liked it so much that we did a tune for it......

WDR: (Laughing with disbelief)

Xero: " It's got good tyres, but not white wall."

Gene: " Certainly not !"

Xero: " Certainly not. Lots of chrome. Still got the CND badge on the front - nobody's broken it off yet......I'm running out of steam a bit here

(laughs all round)

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